Probe Belief

2 Min Welcome/System Check



“Dynamic Inquiry… more importantly is about listening and hearing than asking good questions.” – Mike R Jay, Developmentalist



3 – 0: Pre Test

PROBE Review

Instructions: Choose the letter of the most correct answer.

1. PROBE focuses on:
A. Assumptions
B. Beliefs
C. Insight
D. None

2. PROBE is defined as:
A. Language
B. A form of inquiry
C. Setting context
D. None

3. PROBE is:
A. Interrogatory inquiry
B. Forms of “to be” language
C. Always preceded with a pause
D. None

4. PROBE:
A. Is like sonar
B. Best used first
C. Sets context
D. None

5. PROBE:
A. The best of the DISS 7 skills
B. Is used when context is set
C. Guides the interaction
D. None

Answer key to Pre-test



3 – 1: Q&A In



3 – 3: CONTENT

PROBE:

Probe Belief

View | Watch the video on Probe Beliefs



Our next networked skill — as all the skills are of equal importance… in and over time… is PROBE, or Probe Belief as a pneumonic.




PROBE

Probe Belief

Welcome!

In this session, we’re diving into PROBE — a powerful tool in self-other inquiry, especially for those in helping roles.

Now, PROBE is different from PING in a key way: while PING explores across contexts, PROBE stays within the context of the WHO — the person or situation at hand.

Let’s break it down.




WHO:

PROBE is used when working within someone’s reality — not jumping beyond it.

For self-inquiry, you might ask:

“Does this Conversation In My Head (CIOH) relate to others I’ve had?”

For others, a simple “Can you unpack that?” invites deeper thinking.

Or, if you’re sensing something more beneath the surface, you might ask:

“Is it important to dig deeper?”

These gentle nudges keep the focus on their process, rather than imposing your own.




WHAT:

So, what is a PROBE, exactly?

It’s a tool to unpack — to get details, requirements, and insights. It helps people connect challenges to opportunities, and move toward RightACTION.

For example, you might ask:

“Are you ready to commit to a plan?”

Or simply,

“Is (whatever it is) important?”

The goal? To surface what matters most in the here and now.




WHEN:

When should you use PROBE?

When energy or information is missing.

When you’re unsure if the Person Being Helped (PBH) has what they need to move forward.

And when clarity is required for the next step.

Examples of PROBE in action:

“Is that something you need to know?”

Or,

“Have you spoken to someone about this?”

Notice how these questions don’t assume — they simply open space for discovery… they checkin first!




WHERE:

Let’s talk about where PROBE fits in.

We are all engaged in problem-solving — whether we realize it or not.

Even in casual conversations, where no direct help is requested, PROBE can emerge new energy and information — or as I like to say, “IMULL.”

Here are a few examples:

“Is this a good time to reach out?”

“Are there things holding you back?”

Each of these allows the person to pause, reflect, and choose their next move.




WHY:

Why is PROBE so important?

Because in helping functions, making assumptions is a dangerous game.

We can’t assume what people know, need, or feel — even in close relationships.

And here’s something critical: PROBE is not active listening.

Why? Because in vulnerable situations, people are often too accommodating — they shape their responses based on what they think you want to hear.

Instead, PROBE keeps the focus on them.

Examples:

“Do all the pieces fit together?”

“From this perspective, does everything match up?”

These questions invite their clarity — not yours.




HOW:

Finally, how do we use PROBE effectively?

With humaning language as in to be, to do, to have, to become…

We lean on simple cues — words like:
• Would, could, should
• Do, did, does
• Was, were, is

And the oneders — small but powerful words that prompt deeper thought like:
Hmmm…
If…
Then…
And…
So…
But…
Because…
Until…
Really…
Almost…
Remember…

And of course, the single-word interrogatory , as we call it in THE DISS:
Who? What? When? Where? Why? Which? How?

Another powerful technique?

Mirroring.

When someone says, “This is a big problem,” pause… take a breath… and simply mirror back:

“…big problem?”

That pause — without interpretation — allows them to clarify their own thoughts and feelings.

Because we use their “exact words” it’s actually a mirror rather than the mirroring that tends to emerge in “active listening.”

DISS LISTEN!:

“…big problem…”

ACTIVE LISTEN:

It sounds like you have a big problem…

It’s a much bigger difference than it appears in helping work! (Indirect affirmation is a real problem in developmental helping.



IF you’re skilled in THE DISS, you can go even smaller:

“…big?”

This micro-probing creates space for self-discovery, disclosure… and acceptance?




Closing:

So remember:

Less is more.

Less of you… more of them.

PROBE isn’t about answering — it’s about inviting the answer to emerge.

And when done well, it opens the door to real Connection, Clarification and Commitment. (3Cs)

Thanks for listening — now go practice PROBE in your own conversations!




Copyright Leadership University



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3 – 3: APPLICATION

PART 1 of 3

100823: 7+ min Total Time

[0:00:03]

Greeting:

PH: Hey, XXXX.

PBH: Hi there.



PING



PH:  Anything going on today?

PBH: Yeah. I’m just trying to make a decision about my oldest.



PING



PBH: Is it important to you?

PBH: Very.



PROBE/PERMIT/PING?



PH:  Anything you’d like to say about it?

PBH: We’re trying to move them from their current school to a new school. And we are concerned about the disruption that will cause. But their current school, there’s a situation that’s become untenable. And so, we need to do something, but we’re not sure that moving them at this point in the school year is a good decision.



PING INSIGHT/PROMPT (RightACTION)



PH:  (Name), what’s important?

PBH:  I mean I think the most important thing with them right now is their happiness and well-being. And that’s kind of what’s prompting the desire to move them.

PROBE/PING

PH: Who’s in the conversation?

PBH: Myself, my wife, and my oldest. Because they’re (old enough) and they really should have a say in how they should be educated in their education at this point, so we wanted them involved as well.

PING/PERMIT/PAUSE & BREATHE

Interviewer:                So?



PART 2 of 3

PBH: So, we talked. They are not unhappy, but some of the things that faculty and the administration in their current school has done has really created a situation that puts us in a no-win position. If we ever needed to advocate for them, we wouldn’t be able to do that in an effective way because we’d lose. They have written policies around these issues that are really critical. And so, we’ve introduced the conversation. And I think they are open to it, but I think there’s also fear there because of the unknown. And so, it’s an issue of what you know versus what you don’t. And even the situation you’re in may be a bad situation, you’re still familiar as opposed to the risk of the unknown of moving into a new school.



PING (Insight)/PERTURB



PH: Is there anything that you’re afraid of?  

PBH: I guess as in anything? The fear of making of a poor decision, poorly considered decision, and putting my child in a space where they are unhappy or their mental health and well-being is in danger.




[0:05:02]

PART 3 of 3



PING/PACE CHANGE



PH: Have you thought of a next step?

PBH: We actually have. We have arranged for a school tour at the new school. Like you can do research online, so we’ve researched the various school options. But we’ve arranged for a school tour, that way they can get a sense of what the environment is like and that may be enough to kind of take a peek behind the curtain and see what it might be like to be there so that they can get a sense of what the day-to-day school life would be like. Maybe they can see something there that they feel they could fit in with better.



PING/PACE CHANGE



PH: (Name), is there a question that I need to ask you?

PBH: I think there is a question. But at this point, if it is… am I at a decision point? I mean we definitely are. Like it will be made probably within the next 72 hours.



PING/PROBE



PBH: Do you need some help with your plan?

PBH: I don’t think so. I think it’s just been helpful to help me talk through the mental process of it, to put things out and make sure that I’m going through the appropriate paces.



[Natural] Close



PH:  Well, I sure wish you good luck.

PBH: Thank you.



[0:07:12]  End of Audio



3 – 4: Q&A OUT



Mark Twain once said, “if voting made any difference, they wouldn’t let us do it.”



3- 5: Post-Test

PROBE Review

Instructions: Choose the letter of the most correct answer.
1. PROBE is different from PING because:
A. It explores across different contexts
B. It remains within the context of the WHO
C. It assumes a lack of energy or information
D. None

2. The primary purpose of PROBE is to:
A. Elicit details and commitments
B. Establish active listening
C. Provide answers to problems
D. None

3. When using PROBE, it is important to:
A. Use long, detailed explanations
B. Avoid making assumptions about what the person knows
C. Lead the person to a specific conclusion
D. None

4. PROBE is most useful when:
A. The Person Being Helped (PBH) has all the necessary information
B. The conversation is casual and unrelated to problem-solving
C. There is missing energy or information needed for clarity
D. None

5. A key technique in PROBE is:
A. Using “humaning language” to invite exploration
B. Using active listening to guide responses
C. Answering questions for the other person
D. None

Answer key to Post-test



3 – Reference

A Case Against Active Listening In Helping

When people summarize what another person says unless they use exact words said… more importantly said at the level of VOLTAGE: Vertical, Oblique, (Space)Time complexity as related to AGE/Maturity which is present in the person being helped versus in the person helping… or supposedly “understanding” the persons worldview, frame of reference or values used to interpret the objects of the subjects!

When someone summarizes and interprets as “sounds like it what I hear you saying” should be used for debating not understanding or even something ultimately as important as meeting someone where they are?

Creating an argument against active listening and in favor of Mike R Jay’s dynamic inquiry involves understanding both techniques and arguing for the advantages of dynamic inquiry. Here’s how you might structure that argument:




Thesis: Dynamic inquiry, as introduced by Mike R Jay at LeadU.com, provides a more effective communication strategy compared to active listening by creating OPPOR+UNITY for transforming meaning making and sense making.

Argument Against Active Listening:
1. Surface-Level Engagement:
– Active listening often emphasizes hearing and understanding without exploring deeper meanings. By focusing mainly on paraphrasing and mirroring, it risks oversimplifying complex issues and largely leaves intact the current meaning making making system efficacy.

2. Limited Interaction:
– The repetitive nature of active listening limits dialogue by not encouraging exploration beyond what is immediately spoken. This can stall conversations and hinder genuine understanding. Yet, more so, makes the conversation tip into being led by the person using active listening—at times viable, but without knowing; often suboptimal.

3. Assumption of Understanding:
– Active listening assumes that by simply mirroring, repeating or acknowledging what is said, understanding is achieved. This can lead to misinterpretations if underlying emotions or contexts are not addressed… a complete loss of transformation opportunities and more transactional conversations which assume how things are is all there is.

4. Boundary of Responsibility:
– Shifting all the responsibility for communication to the listener can absolve the speaker from ensuring their message is clear, leading to ineffective “transactional”exchanges where one person assumes the “lead.”

In Favor of Dynamic Inquiry:
1. Encourages Deep Exploration:
– Dynamic inquiry focuses on probing deeper levels of meaning and development through strategic questioning, ensuring the person being helped has the option of revealing ready, willing, able and fit solution gathering competence.

2. Adaptive and Responsive:
– Unlike the static approach of active listening, dynamic inquiry allows for adaptability in conversations, enabling participants to respond to the evolving dynamics of the dialogue.

3. Facilitates Mutual Discovery:
– By encouraging questioning and reevaluation of ideas, dynamic inquiry allows both speaker and listener to discover new perspectives and insights together.

4. Promotes Responsibility in Communication:
– Dynamic inquiry mandates that both the speaker and listener engage actively in the communication process, fostering a shared responsibility for clarity and understanding of the person being helped tools for solution finding.

Conclusion:

Dynamic inquiry offers a robust framework for effective communication by promoting a deeper level of engagement and adaptability. It addresses the limitations of active listening by fostering a mutual exploration that encourages the revealing of narrative, meaning making and sense making with real-time adaptability to shifting conversational landscapes when it comes to the helping environment.




Pre-Test: PROBE Review

By pointing out the limitations of active listening and showcasing the advantages of dynamic inquiry, this argument highlights why the latter may be a more effective communication tool for those who chose and are chosen for help.




Pre-Test: Answer Key

1. PROBE focuses on:
B. Beliefs

2. PROBE is defined as:
B. A form of inquiry

3. PROBE is:
D. None

4. PROBE:
D. None

5. PROBE is different from PING because:
B. It remains within the context of the WHO

Back to Pre-test



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Our team at Living &Loving Inquiry

Mike R Jay & Gary Gile
Founders @ The NEW LeadU

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